Yesterday was the most glorious, ordinary day. It is Sping Break this week and so I am home with my kids. I can honestly say that going into this week I was a bit scared, "What am I going to do with them all week?" Normally we would have a trip planned and play dates scheduled. Our trip was cancelled and I am not much for play dates being that my kids entertain each other very well. So I was left with this anxiety . . ."What are we going to do?"
I recently signed up for Mindy Tsonas Wish Big Camp and I thought well If I can go to camp online, then I can certainly bring camp to them right here at home. Camp Bromley came into existence. We've had sleepovers in mommy's bed (HUGE deal), movie night, making pancakes into Star Wars characters and yesterday we played outside all day. This may sound like normal life to some, but I have not had real fun with my kids in many months.
Dillon and his first painting in our new art room.
William and his genius work of art.
I have been mentally absent, completely numb. I just finished reading The Gifts of Imperfection by the AMAZING Brene Brown a few weeks ago. I also was blessed enough to watch her video on PBS last week. Brene talks about how when we numb the bad feelings we also numb the good. I understood what she was saying. I've heard her say it numerous times. But I didn't really GET it. I didn't get it becasue I was still numbing.
I knew it was time to stop numbing. So I did, I stopped. Just like that. After 7 days of abstinence from binging and being mindful of what I was putting in my mouth, I felt great. But I didn't realize that the best was yet to come.
Situations in my personal life that were beyond my control were causing me a great deal of pain. I wanted to eat so badly, to make the pain go away. I did eat to comfort. It was not what I was eating, but how I was eating. I was not physically hungry, but ate anyway. The seven days of abstinence gave me the clarity to see the behavior as it was happening. I was able to stop. And here's the biggest part . . .I did not beat myself up for it. Instead I immersed myself in lovely inspiring blog after blog. I paid a visit to the Savor and Serve Cafe with Jen Louden, and got what I needed. Not food. . .LOVE!!
So this brings me back to Camp Bromley. I have had the most amazing time with my kids. I have been able to SAVOR every second. We had the most incredible time yesterday. We painted, played, listened to music and talked. We connected for the first time in a long time. They were like little sponges who wanted to soak up every bit of me that I could offer. What a gift!
My little Texans posing with their finish products.
I am reminded of a post from Bindu Wiles a few weeks back, Remembering Your Genius. The Artist in You. When I am feeling my feelings, good and bad, I am giving my children the permission to do the same. To be themselves, and they in turn are such an inspiration to me. They give me permission to be myself, my crazy creative self. (I even let them put a Spiderman tatoo on my arm and have been wearing proudly)
Here they are again with such simple words, that sometimes I need to hear over and over again.
My Rockstars from Jennifer Doyle on Vimeo.
So I am so grateful today for all the women listed above and many more who are not listed who have shared their experinces with me and many others. The women who daily share their love, their truth with the world. I have been listening, reading, watching and finally feeling it. Thank you for this gift, as I will need to come back to this feeling often to be reminded why it is so important to keep leaning into the discomfort and the joy. Sending love and laughter . . XOXOXO!
Recent Comments